I need to write about what happened on Friday. I don't know how to move past what I'm feeling without putting it on (proverbial) paper. I'm having a difficult time understanding what happened. It's as if my mind simply cannot compute how a person enters a school with the intent of killing children. Children. Six and seven year olds. I have a seven year old in my house! I tried all weekend not to transfer the situation onto Madeline, Jack and Emma. I tried to not picture them in this situation. Each time I pictured the scene occurring here I would physically shudder.
When the names of the children were released, and the pictures were shown, I cried along with everyone else. These sweet, innocent children with their missing teeth and happy faces. These amazing little ones, who loved ponies and Legos and Barbies. All I can think is "why?".
All I can do is hold the little ones in my life a little closer. Let them know how loved they are. How precious they are.
I won't go into what I think needs to happen. I won't blather on about my feelings about gun control, violence in our society or how if I need to see the pain on the face of one more person who senselessly lost a loved one I'll scream.
I will say a prayer tonight for the 27 victims of this sick man. For the 26 children who won't see tomorrow. For their parents and siblings. Grandparents, aunts and uncles. Friends and playmates. For the teachers who put themselves in line of fire so that their little ones could be saved.
I pray for peace in this country. I pray for an end to this. Today.